silent please.

I feel like shutting myself up in my room for whole day now.
The feeling of being cheated, not being trusted, supported and encouraged is so darn sxxx. It ruined my mood, made my brain burst.

You encouraged me when i was down, when i needed somebody by my side. I felt glad, happy and appreciate. But then, when i really got the chance and i can finally move on, you stopped me and kept persuading me not to do so.WHY?
You were not telling me or analysing the problem to me but you were just using those NOT-A-PROBLEM to be the PROBLEMs.

Every time when you asked me:" How was this? How was that? So what is your decision?" You made me felt like you were trying to persuade me again. I dont know why. Is it because you dont want to lose me?Want me to stay by yourside?I DONT KNOW.
You told me too many excuses until all of them pissed me off.

I felt sad and regret to treat you like this when i was looking at your back, when i heard your sigh and realized that my problem was kept staying in your mind. I felt that the way i treated you was really the failure as a daughter . But i cant control myself when you start asking me those questions again.

Because the disappointment increases and increases.

I dont know why, i dont know how.

I wonder why everyone is not putting their trust on me.
I WONDER WHY.